Non-stop

You know, I keep hoping for a weekend where I can just…relax and not have to do much, a time when I can recharge my batteries and come into work the next day rested and ready.

…Maybe one day I’ll know what that’s like.

This past holiday weekend started with me being a little frustrated because I cancelled on one group of friends to hang out with another, just to have that group of friends cancel on me too. And then I was (unnecessarily?) hard on myself when I didn’t make myself get up to go do something else on my own. Friday was not a good night, kids.

But Saturday and the days following made up for it, I think. I spent most of Saturday running some errands and then I met some friends for dinner and drinks. After that, we went back to one of my friend’s place in NJ and stayed up waaaaaaaay too late…but it was fun.

Why was I in NJ, you ask? Very simple – we were going to the beach! I haven’t been to the beach in a long time and while it’s not my favorite vacation spot, it certainly is pretty great if you can get it. We had to endure a lot of traffic on the way there and it was hot as Hades’s balls, but we got there and it was gorgeous. Plus everything felt better once we got there and took off our suits; things just felt more comfortable and free and…

…what? Oh, did I not mention that this was a clothing-optional beach? 🙈

Yeah, definitely my first time at a nude beach, but believe it or not, I was pretty damned comfortable once I got there. Were there other people there who looked better than me? Yeah, but that’s not what it was about. After about an hour or so of being there, I completely forgot that I wasn’t wearing any clothing. True, there are reminders every now and then, but once you’re sitting around having fun with your friends, it really doesn’t matter.

There is, I suppose, a conversation to be had about seeing some of your friends naked for the first time, but again, it really wasn’t that big of a deal. If we weren’t so sexually repressed in this country/culture, then it wouldn’t be a big deal. But as it stands, the moment I even mention to my mother that that’s where I was this weekend, she blushes and tells me that she doesn’t wanna hear about it. Ah well.

Either way, it was still fun and I only got burned a little (nowhere indelicate). It did rev me up a bit though, being surrounded by naked people all day long, so even though I was thoroughly and completely exhausted by the time I made it home that night, I still made a point of inviting a guy over who I’d been talking to via an app for a few days to let off some steam. Honestly, it’s the first time I’ve gotten laid since March and GAWD did I need it. It helps that he’s a sweet guy, too.

After that, two of my best friends of DC came up to visit and we spent 2 really great days hanging out together. I always feel so at home and comfortable with them, like I’ve lived with them my entire life and their visits are just an extension of that normalcy. They even helped me through a minor freak-out at a restaurant where I was literally being given eyes by a cute guy at the bar and I had no idea what to say or how to act. I just have no idea how to react in that situation or what to say and so I had a bit of a minor panic attack because definitely wanted to capitalize on the opportunity but was so anxious that I had no idea how. They helped me to feel comfortable and we did go speak to them – who knows, maybe I just made new friends?

I was sad to see my friends leave on July 4th, but I was also completely and totally drained after everything I’ve done this weekend. I was supposed to go to a party at an acquaintance’s place in Brooklyn but I kinda just lazy-ed out and didn’t go. I still feel kinda bad about that because I feel like any opportunity like that could be a chance for me to make more friends and meet new people and I shouldn’t be turning those down. But…it was in Brooklyn…and that’s far…and I was tired. I didn’t even want to see fireworks, but the guy from after-beach-sex wanted to see some, so I went with him to see what we could see. We couldn’t really find a good spot to see them, so we gave up and I went home. That’s right, that’s how tired I was, folks – I DIDN’T EVEN WANT TO GET LAID AFTER.

But it was still a great weekend. Ups and downs and drama and fun and I didn’t even get to everything that I wanted to get to. All I’m saying is that I could really use a few days where I don’t have anything going on for once. All of this “social life” stuff is exhausting.

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